[Ongoing] [Playb Yejun Bing's Story] Becoming the Me Who Doesn't Know You Episode 2

✎ Author: dddbbb

★ Rating: 10 points
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Episode 2 Yesterday's Confession, Today's Street

The studio was as busy as usual, but everyone's mood had changed since yesterday.

ㅇㅇ wore headphones and pretended like nothing happened.

Yejun's confession from last night was lingering in my head, but I had gathered my wits.

What are you doing now? I've already given up.

At that moment, the door opened and Yejun came in. Our eyes met briefly, but ㅇㅇ quickly averted his gaze. Yejun also greeted the members without saying much.

“Hey, I’ll give you a guide file for what we’re going to record today.”

Noah approached.

“Yeah, thanks.”

ㅇㅇ answered briefly.

“I’ll record first today, sis.”

Ha Min stepped forward. Noah, Bambi, and Eunho also couldn't hide their cautious expressions.

The recording started and the turn went to Yejun and Chaeyoung.

The two laughed, struck a chord, and even joked around lightly.

ㅇㅇ bowed his head.

Look, that's right. The only time you liked me was for a little while.

A corner of my heart ached. I was the one who decided to erase my heart, but it was crueler than I thought.

Bambi, who was watching the scene, whispered to Eunho.

“Eunho, ㅇㅇ is weird.”

“Yeah. Anyone can see that.”

Eunho sighed softly and glared at Yejun.

Brother… Why are you always so clueless at times like this?

⸻

The two laughed and clapped their hands in front of the microphone.

It was a good look. It was natural and nice to look at.

I was sitting on the sofa, but it seemed like the laughter was coming from next to me, through my earphones.

I guess you ended up regretting saying you liked me.

All my efforts to smile and pretend that everything was okay fell apart.

I just wanted it to be over quickly. I wanted no one to talk to me, no one to see me.

But strangely, everyone seemed to care more.

Noah was loitering around me, and Ha-min was cracking jokes.

Bambi watched me closely, and Eunho became quieter today.

You all know what happened yesterday.

I tried to keep a straight face. But my gaze kept going towards Yejun.

Laughter.

Affectionate expression.

Soft voice.

See, that's right.

The words hidden in my heart scratched me again.

⸻

The atmosphere was one of finishing up the recording and organizing.

I was moving slowly for no reason, wasting time. I was afraid that if I went out first, someone would follow me.

I sat on the first floor, next to the vending machine, in a corner of the hallway. The sound of the machine, the laughter. Everything was burdensome.

I started doing this because I liked it, but when did it turn into this?

At that moment, I heard quiet footsteps. I could tell without even opening my eyes.

"yes."

Hannoah.

“I want to be alone.”

He said it without even opening his mouth.

“That’s why I didn’t want to leave you alone.”

Noah sat quietly next to me.

There was no word for a while. The silence was rather comfortable.

“Everyone noticed what happened yesterday.”

Noah spoke carefully. I asked without turning my head.

“Did he tell you that?”

“No. Your expression.”

The expression he was trying to hide collapsed at those words.

“Then that’s true. There’s no way Nam Ye-jun would say that. He’s always nice. I’m the only one who thinks badly of him.”

I looked at Noah and asked.

“Why am I the only one who is becoming so… ugly? Do you think it’s strange, too?”

“You idiot. You’re not weird at all.”

Noah's words were indifferent, but there was warmth in them.

I sat next to Noah and closed my eyes. Silently, without wishing for anything.

Noah would sometimes absentmindedly tap the back of my hand. That strangely comforted me.

“Should I be more of a slacker?”

He asked.

"huh."

I answered briefly.

The hallway was still quiet. Time seemed to have stopped.

⸻

After a while, the phone vibrated.

The name 'Yejun' appeared.

I stared at the screen and then quietly turned it off.

Noah saw that and said nothing. Instead, he slowly got up.

“Let’s go up to the studio first. I’ll buy you some time until you feel better.”

I nodded and followed.

⸻

When we got back to the studio, everyone had roughly finished tidying up. They were busy packing their bags and organizing their earphones.

Yejun glanced at me and then turned away. I pretended not to see him.

“Kids, let’s skip the meeting today.”

Noah said naturally.

“Everyone is tired.”

“Right. I’ll go home and spread it too.”

Bambi clapped his hands.

Eunho and Hamin also nodded quietly. You could tell that everyone was considerate.

I just laughed briefly.

"huh."

⸻

The moment I left the studio, someone cautiously called out from behind me.

“Yeah.”

Nam Ye-jun.

I paused for a moment, but then nodded and continued walking.

Yejun didn't come closer. He just stood there.

Me and you. Without doing anything.

⸻

As I left him and went outside, the cold air brushed my face. The air was unusually chilly today.

I closed my coat and trudged along. After walking for a while, I turned toward the parking lot.

At that moment, a familiar car quietly approached me.

The driver's side window rolled down and Ha-min's face popped out.

“Sister, should I take you home?”

Ha Min's voice was careful. It seemed as if he was just handing it over without forcing it.

I hesitated for a moment and then nodded.

Ha Min opened the passenger door without saying a word.

Ha Min grabbed the steering wheel without saying anything and didn't start until I said so.

I quietly fastened my belt and looked outside.

“Take it slow.”

When I said a few words, Ha Min smiled slightly and nodded.

The car started moving very slowly.

It was dreary outside, but strangely enough, inside the car it was warm.

The car drove quietly down the road. Ha-min turned down the radio volume, placed his hands on the steering wheel, and looked out the window.

"…it's hard?"

Ha Min's voice was low and cautious. I couldn't answer right away.

I knew. Ha Min's heart. The heart that cautiously circled around me.

So I thought I shouldn't lean on him so easily. I didn't want to be someone who takes advantage of his feelings.

I shook my head quietly.

Ha Min nodded without saying anything. They spent a long time together in silence.

⸻

The car stopped at a traffic light. Ha Min looked out the window and then spoke carefully again.

“I even told a stupid joke today to make you laugh.”

I looked at him. Ha-min didn't look at me and just looked out the window. It was as if he was afraid that he would collapse if he met my eyes.

I laughed softly.

“It was a little funny.”

It was true. Ha Min's heart was warm and clumsy, but thanks to that, he was able to endure.

Only then did Ha Min smile slightly.

"thank god."

⸻

When he arrived in front of the house, Ha Min stopped the car and stood still for a while.

“If you want to be alone, just let me go, but if not… I’ll stay with you even if I don’t say anything.”

I grabbed the doorknob and hesitated for a moment.

Ha Min was neither in a hurry nor did he press her. He just waited.

I ended up shaking my head slightly.

"are you okay."

Ha Min nodded slowly.

“Yeah. But… it’s true. Anytime.”

Those words strangely stayed in my heart for a long time.

I closed the door and stood there until the car drove away.

Ha Min slowly disappeared until the end, as if he felt sorry for leaving me behind.

⸻

After the car completely disappeared, I lowered my head.

I thought that I should never take advantage of the loneliness I felt right now and the affection that Ha-min gave me.

I had to be alone until I was okay on my own.

A street left alone.

Cool air.

My mind is still not organized.

I walked slowly towards the house.

I'm swallowing today as if I'm swallowing it whole.

⸻

That night, after washing up alone, ㅇㅇ stood in front of the mirror and sighed deeply.

I rubbed my damp face with my hands and recalled the memories of yesterday.

Every time I think of Yejun's confession, something in my heart clutches painfully.

His eyes were serious at that time, but I knew what Yejun meant when he said that while he was drunk.

I took out my phone and checked the message from Yejun, but I didn't want to read it anymore.

I also didn't want to make many people uncomfortable because of my feelings.

ㅇㅇ realized that she just had to get away from him. If she held onto those feelings, she would get hurt again.

If I had just given up, there would have been no reason for that to happen again.

⸻

I looked out the window, unable to fall asleep.

Before I knew it, it was dawn. An ambiguous time between darkness and dawn.

I tried to remember. Back when we were all in high school, we made a small promise.

“Let’s all make a song together.”

That simple and innocent promise was our beginning.

We vaguely dreamed of a future where music would be on stage.

At that time, Chaeyoung was already a person from another world.

She was singing on stage while we were still running through the school hallways.

A famous name seen on TV. Lee Chae-young.

Yejun liked that kind of Chaeyoung. It was simply his fandom.

Chaeyoung's voice is nice, Chaeyoung's lyrics are really pretty, it was a name that Yejun would often say as if it were a habit, as he would put aside his studies to play the guitar.

So the five of us continued to write songs.

It was clumsy but earnest, and rustic but sincere.

Yejun made a new resolution on his own.

'I want to write a song for Chaeyoung someday.'

I found out about that wish by chance.

So I worked harder. I wanted to help the person I had been watching since I was young achieve his dream.

⸻

With great difficulty, we got into a label. We were clumsy producers, but we were sincere. And as time went by, we ended up taking on projects like Chaeyoung.

“Wow, this is awesome. We’re really working with Chaeyoung.”

The first day that Chaeyoung and Yejun's names were linked, Yejun's eyes sparkled. I was also happy to see him so happy. We achieved it together, it was our dream.

At first it was like that.

That's exactly what happened.

⸻

But as time passed, something changed.

Yejun still worked hard on writing songs. He was serious and sincere. But sometimes he would compliment Chaeyoung without thinking.

“Chaeyoung’s voice is really crazy. She also writes really good lyrics.”

I laughed and agreed with those words.

“Yeah, it was cool.”

He asked with a trailing edge.

“If you like it that much, why don’t you confess to me? If Chaeyoung confesses, I’ll probably accept it.”

It was a light-hearted, joking tone.

Yejun chuckled and answered nonchalantly.

“You’ll accept it? But, well, that won’t happen.”

His words seemed to have been thrown out without much thought.

At that moment, I felt like I was being splashed with cold water.

I tried to laugh it off, but a corner of my heart quietly sank.

'Oh, it's true.'

I was so mistaken.

No, I believed that myself.

⸻

At some point, Yejun stopped talking about Chaeyoung.

Was he conscious of it, or was he trying to distance himself?

I knew it.

Producers know that when personal feelings get mixed in while working, it falls apart.

Yejun knew that too. That's why he tried hard to hide his feelings.

I just kept quiet and tried to maintain my position as a producer.

I was overcome by an inexplicable sense of loneliness as I watched such examples.

⸻

Then one day it happened.

One day, while I was working late, I happened to hear it as I was passing by the studio hallway.

A conversation leaked out through a crack in the door.

“…I like you, oppa.”

A familiar voice. Chaeyoung.

I froze in place. It felt like I couldn't breathe.

I took a step back without realizing it, fearing that my footsteps might be heard.

I couldn't hear any more. I didn't want to hear any more.

As I turned around, it felt like my heart had been ripped out.

⸻

Since that day, I couldn't fully hear anything Yejun said. Chaeyoung and Yejun were the same as before. They were still nice to look at, and there was no awkwardness between them. Did they become a couple? I don't know. I tried to avoid Yejun so as not to be a bother, and I made a promise.

But was it that easy?

When Yejun asked me why I was trying to distance myself from him

My heart wavered.

As Yejun approached me, all these emotions became more complicated.

Is he approaching me just to comfort me or because he genuinely likes me?

After hearing the confession, I tried to pretend like nothing happened, but the more I did, the more confused I became.

So his actions, his affectionate gaze.

I thought that maybe his words, “I like you,” were just a delusion.

It was just trying to comfort me when I was having a hard time, my mind was complicated because of what happened with Chaeyoung, and all of those things overlapped and made me lean on it.

Nothing more than that.

I brainwashed myself into believing that.

No, I wanted to believe it.

That's how I was able to endure this pain.

_____

The dawn was unnecessarily long, and only in the endless hours did my heart gradually calm down.

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<Becoming the Me Who Doesn't Know You Episode 3> Click

<Click for full episode of I Don't Know You>

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